This is Why an Octopus is More Awesome Than Your Mom

posted Jul 11, 2012, 1:01 PM by Webmaster SeaHorse   [ updated Jul 11, 2012, 3:53 PM ]
This comes to us from our friend The Oatmeal...

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you think your mother, or perhaps mothers in general, are pretty goddamn awesome. They scrub things, cook pot roast, and produce shrieking little babies which grow up to be astronauts and prime ministers. When you got sucker-punched at recess, she was there for you. When you accidentally peed your pants on the first day of school, she wiped away the tears. When the cat ate your favorite hamster and then barfed it onto your favorite pair of pajamas, she was your shoulder to cry on. Mothers sacrifice their own happiness for the betterment of their offspring

Like most universally liked things, however, there's always a better underdog.

Enter the Octopus...

My mom is pretty awesome.  How can a squishy undersea bag of phlegm possibly be more awesome than her?

Really?  Does your mom eat her extra babies to keep up her strength?  Is she awesomely huge and intimidating?  Does she entertain herself by tormenting her fellow creatures?  Could she take down a caribou with her bare hands and suck out its delicious innards?  Can she let a limb tear off to escape a predator, then grow it back?  I didn't think so.

Read This is Why an Octopus is More Awesome Than Your Mom for the whole, awesome story.